This week we’re going to fix ad slogans.

Plenty of slogans are inaccurate. Well your team names are going to fix that.

Tinder: Feel lonelier than ever

Red Bull gives you a headache and tastes terrible

The Irish backpaker my dad hired picks the fruit that goes to Cottee’s

Eat Fresh…ish

Tupperware: Throw your leftovers out next week instead

The debt you go into to buy this diamond is forever

Any ad slogans revamped for honesty will get you a bonus point.

Have an interesting week.

Everyone likes feeling like they’re the best at something.

So for your team name, inspired by someone who described one of our hosts as “the most jacked trivia host I’ve ever seen” (which is a pretty low bar), your team name should be a set of criteria in which you would be at the top of the list.

If this quiz was just questions on the first season of Veronica Mars I’d clean up

Greater knowledge of Taylor Swift lyrics than an uncontacted tribe in the Amazon

Naming more stations on the New York subway than people who have never been to New York

Speaking Welsh better than anyone else on this bus

Stack the deck in your favour as much as you need, and tell us what specific thing you are best at.

Have an interesting week.

You often hear about red flags in the dating world, but it’s usually applied to other people.

For your team name this week, we want to know what red flags there are about YOU.

Constant oversharing

I prefer sarcasm to sincerity

Haven’t cleaned my car in 2 years

I won’t like you if you like me

Zero interest in getting a better job

Don’t care about birthdays

Uneasy being around people who are emotionally mature

I have a side job asking question in bars

Any red flag of yours that might turn others off will get you a bonus point.

Have an interesting week.

There are lists you might want to be at the top of.

This week we’re not thinking about those lists. For your team name this week, we want to know what list you DON’T want to be on.

The Epstein List (obviously)

Most times arrested for driving while drunk

17^th on a priority list for kidney transplants when there are only 16 available

Country arresting the most journalists

Record for consecutive days buying hemorrhoid cream

Any lists you don’t want to be on will get a bonus point.

Have an interesting week.

This week we’re thinking about greeting cards.

But nothing so vague as Happy Birthday, or Get Well Soon, or Congratulations on Your New Job.

No, your team name should be an EXTREMELY specific greeting card.

Sorry to hear your wife lost a tooth after slipping on a wet floor in the supermarket

Happy 47^th birthday to my second favourite oncologist

Congratulations from your great aunt on being accepted into a graduate program in accounting

Please allow me to punch the next person who says everything happens for a reason

Any ridiculously specific greeting cards will get a bonus point.

If you need ideas, try this sketch for inspiration.

Have an interesting week.

As we post this, it is the anniversary of the moon landings.

It was a big moment for humanity, in as much as it gave cranky people everywhere an excuse to complain about things.

You probably heard someone say “we can land a man on the moon but we can’t…”

Well this week, your team names are going to finish that sentence.

Get a ziploc on potato chip bags

Make a drive thru speaker that is actually audible

Perform a prostate exam without… fingers

Build an anti-microwave that cools things in seconds

Print a black and white page when we’re low on magenta

Send a man to the moon again 56 years later

Tell us something you’re amazed we can’t do in light of the fact that we can land on the moon for a bonus point.

Have an interesting week.

This week we want you to think about everyday items, and then take them beyond their limitations.

Specifically, you’re working with the formula… “every BLANK is a SUCH AND SUCH BLANK if you…”

Look at these examples to get the idea.

Every bag is a sleeping bag if you’re tired enough

Every car is an electric car if you stick an electric motor in the back seat

Every bike is a folding bike if you’re strong enough

Every chair is a lawn chair if you take it outside

Every zoo is a petting zoo if you have no regard for personal safety

Every restaurant is a drive through restaurant if you drive a tank

Every bank is a sperm bank if you’re willing to get arrested for indecent exposure

Any item taken beyond its usual context will get a bonus point.

Have an interesting week.

We’ve got some pretty skilled players at iQ Trivia.

And this week, for your team name, we want to know what obsolete skills you have.

I can drive a manual transmission

Cursive

I still remember people’s phone numbers

Navigating using a map rather than GPS

Any skills you have that are not as critical as they once were will get you a bonus point.

Have an interesting week.